Dumb Laws
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Dumb Laws
by American Beauty Wed Apr 27, 2011 10:25 pm
Wyoming Dumb Laws
• Junk dealers may not make any business transactions with drunk persons.
• It is illegal to wear a hat that obstructs people’s view in a public theater or place of amusement.
• Using a firearm to fish is strictly forbidden.
• It is illegal for women to stand within five feet of a bar while drinking.
• You may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April without an official permit.
Wisconsin Dumb State Laws
• Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons.
• Whenever two trains meet at an intersection of said tracks, neither shall proceed until the other has.
• As people used to smuggle it in from Illinois, all yellow butter substitute is banned.
• Condoms were considered an obscene article and had to hidden behind the pharmacist’s counter.
• At one time, margarine was illegal.
• State Law made it illegal to serve apple pie in public restaurants without cheese.
• While all cheese making requires a license, Limburger cheesemaking requires a master cheese maker’s license.
• It is illegal to kiss on a train.
• It is illegal to cut a woman’s hair.
• Margarine may not be substituted for butter in restaurants unless it is requested by the customer.
• The government may not prohibit manual flushed urinals.
• One may not camp in a wagon on any public highway or risk a fine of up to ten dollars.
• It is a class A misdemeanor to wave a burning torch around in the air.
• Livestock have the right-of-way on public roads.
Wisconsin Dumb City Laws
Brookfield:
• Tattooing is illegal unless it is done for medical purposes.
• It is unlawful for one to allow another to use the first person’s telephone in order to make prank phone calls.
Hudson:
• Screens are required on all windows from May 1 to October 1.
Kenosha:
• No male is allowed to be in a state of arousal in public.
La Crosse:
• It is illegal to tie up your horse along Third Street (Now a major bar strip).
• It is illegal to display an unclothed mannequin in a store window.
• It is illegal to play checkers in public.
• You cannot “worry" a squirrel.
Milwaukee:
• An old ordinance forbids parking for over two hours unless a horse is tied to the car.
• If one is thought of as offensive looking, it is illegal for him to be in public during the day.
• It is illegal to purchase or use sparklers in the city, yet you can buy fully disassembled automatic machine guns.
Racine:
• Missiles may not be shot at parade participants.
• It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.
• Women may not walk down a public street at night without being accompanied by a man.
Sheboygan:
• No person may water his lawn in such a way as to annoy his or her neighbor.
St. Croix:
• Women are not allowed to wear anything red in public.
Sun Prairie:
• Nuclear weapons may not be manufactured in the city limits.
• Persons may not ride a bicycle with their hands off the handlebars.
• Cats are forbidden from entering cemeteries.
West Virginia Dumb Laws
• Unmarried couples who live together and “lewdly associate” with one another may face up to a year in prison.
• Any person who commits adultery shall be fined at least twenty dollars.
• It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs.
• A person may be placed in jail for up to six months for making fun of someone who does not accept a challenge.
• It is illegal to snooze on a train.
• A person may not hold public office if he or she has ever participated in a duel.
• For each act of public swearing a person shall be fined one dollar.
• According to the state constitution, it is unlawful for anyone to own a red or a black flag.
• If you wear a hat inside a theater, you may be fined.
• Roadkill may be taken home for supper.
• Whistling underwater is prohibited.
West Virginia Dumb City Laws:
Alderson:
• One may not walk a lion, tiger or leopard, even on a leash.
Huntington:
• Firemen may not whistle or flirt at any woman passing a firehouse.
• It is legal to beat your wife so long as it is done in public on Sunday, on the courthouse steps.
Nicholas County:
• No member of the clergy is allowed to tell jokes or humorous stories from the pulpit during a church service.
Washington Dumb Laws
• No person may walk about in public if he or she has the common cold.
• Destroying a beer cask or bottle of another is illegal.
• It is illegal to entice girls away from the Maple Lane School for girls.
• X-rays may not be used to fit shoes.
• All lollipops are banned.
• A law to reduce crime states: “It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town".
• People may not buy a mattress on Sunday.
• All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle.
• It is illegal to pretend that one’s parents are rich.
• When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed.
• You cannot buy meat of any kind on Sunday.
Washington Dumb City Laws:
Bremerton:
• You may not shuck peanuts on the street.
Everett:
• It is illegal to display a hypnotized or allegedly hypnotized person in a store window.
Lynden:
• Dancing and drinking may not occur at the same establishment.
Seattle:
• You may not carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length.
• Women who sit on men’s laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term.
• No one may set fire to another person’s property without prior permission.
• It is illegal to carry a fishbowl or aquarium onto a bus because the sound of the water sloshing may disturb other passengers.
Spokane:
• No one may kneel on a pedestrian skywalk.
• Persons may not wear a life jacket near the Spokane River.
• TV’s may not be bought on Sundays.
Walla Walla:
• It is illegal to give noxious substances to a bird in any city park.
Wilbur:
• You may not ride an ugly horse.
Virginia Dumb Laws
• Not only is it illegal to have sex with the lights on, one may not have sex in any position other than missionary.
• There is a state law prohibiting “corrupt practices of bribery" by any person other than candidates.
• You may not engage in business on Sundays, with the exception of almost every industry.
• If one is not married, it is illegal for him to have sexual relations.
• You may not have oral or anal sex.
• Citizens must honk their horn while passing other cars.
• Children are not to go trick-or-treating on Halloween.
• It is illegal to tickle women.
• No animal may be hunted for on Sunday with the exception of raccoons, which may be hunted until 2:00 AM.
Virginia Dumb City Laws:
Culpeper:
• No one may wash a mule on the sidewalk.
Dayton:
• A person of color may not be oustide or within the city limits after 7 pm.
Norfolk:
• A man may face 60 days in jail for patting a woman’s derriere.
• Women must wear a corsette after sundown and be in the company of male chaperone.
Prince William County:
• It is illegal to cuss about another.
• It is illegal to park a car on railroad tracks.
Richmond:
• It is illegal to flip a coin in a restaurant to see who pays for a coffee.
Stafford County:
• It is legal for a man to beat his wife on the courthouse steps so long as it is before 8:00 pm.
Virginia Beach:
• If you are drunk and not driving your car, and the person who is driving the car is drunk as well, you may both receive DUIs.
• It is illegal for a person to ride on the handlebars of a bike.
• It is illegal to use profanity on Atlantic Avenue or the boardwalk.
• It is also unlawful to drive by the same place within 30 minutes on Atlantic Avenue.
Waynesboro:
• It is illegal for a woman to drive a car up Main Street unless her husband is walking in front of the car waving a red flag.
Vermont Dumb Laws
• Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.
• At one time it was illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole.
Vermont Dumb City Laws:
Barre:
• All residents shall bathe every Saturday night.
Utah Dumb Laws
• It is against the law to fish from horseback.
• It is illegal not to drink milk.
• It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon.
• Birds have the right of way on all highways.
• A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence.
• It is a felony to persistently tread on the cracks between paving stones on the sidewalk of a state highway.
• It’s legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list.
• No one may have sex in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency call.
• Alcohol may not be sold during an emergency.
• It is illegal to cause a catastrophe.
Utah Dumb City Laws:
Kaysville:
• You must have identification to enter a convenience store after dark.
Logan:
• Women may not swear.
Monroe:
• Daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor.
Provo:
• Throwing snowballs will result in a $50 fine.
Salt Lake County:
• No one may walk down the street carrying a paper bag containing a violin.
• Auctions may not be advertised by hiring trombone players to play on the street.
Tremonton:
• It is illegal to have sex in a moving ambulance and if you are caught the guy is let go and the woman is punished and her name appears in the newspaper.
Texas Dumb State Laws
• One must acknowledge a supreme being before being able to hold public office.
• The Bluebonnet is the official song of the state flower.
• It is illegal to sell ones eye.
• A program has been created in the state that attempts to control the weather.
• When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.
• It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
• Up to a felony charge can be levied for promoting the use of, or owning more than six dildos.
• It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel.
• It is illegal to milk another person’s cow.
• A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.
• Homosexual behavior is a misdemeanor offense.
• The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home.
Texas Dumb City Laws
Abilene:
• It is illegal to idle or loiter anyplace within the corporate limits of the city for the purpose of flirting or mashing.
Austin:
• Wire cutters can not be carried in your pocket.
Beaumont:
• Collegiate football is banned at Lamar University.
Borger:
• It is against the law to throw confetti, rubber balls, feather dusters, whips or quirts (riding crop), and explosive firecrackers of any kind.
Clarendon:
• It is illegal to dust any public building with a feather duster.
Dallas:
• It’s illegal to possess realistic dildos.
El Paso
• Urinating on the streets is illegal.
• Appearing in public places wearing a “lewd dress” is prohibited.
El Paso:
• Churches, hotels, halls of assembly, stores, markets, banking rooms, railroad depots, and saloons are required to provide spittoons “of a kind and number to efficiently contain expectorations into them.
Galveston:
• It is illegal to drive a motor car down Broadway before noon on Sundays.
• "Offensive gestures" will not be tolerated at any special event.
• Bicycles must be operated at a “reasonable speed”.
• One needs permission from the director of parks and recreation before getting drunk in any city park.
• No person shall throw trash from an airplane.
• Landing an airplane on the beach is illegal.
• No person shall inhale fumes from model glue.
• Any person who sits on a sidewalk may be fined up to $500.
Harker Heights:
• No person may disturb a church service by swearing.
• Drivers of city vehicles must respect all traffic rules just like the rest of us.
Houston:
• It is illegal to sell Limburger cheese on Sunday.
• Beer may not be purchased after midnight on a Sunday, but it may be purchased on Monday.
Jasper:
• Dogs must be on a leash at ALL times.
LeFors:
• It is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer while standing.
Lubbock County:
• It is illegal to drive within an arm’s length of alcohol – including alcohol in someone else’s blood stream.
Mesquite:
• It is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
Port Arthur:
• Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in an elevator.
Richardson:
• It is illegal to do “U Turns”.
• It is now illegal to place a “for sale” sign on a car if it visible from the street.
San Antonio:
• It is illegal to urinate on the Alamo.
• It is illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation using the eyes and/or hands.
Temple:
• Cattle thieves may be hanged on the spot.
• You can ride your horse in the saloon.
• No one may ride a horse and buggy through the town square.
Texarkana:
• Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights.
Tennessee Dumb Laws
• You can’t shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile.
• Hollow logs may not be sold.
• More than 8 women may not live in the same house because that would constitute a brothel.
• It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish.
• “Crimes against nature” are prohibited.
• Ministers are to be dedicated to God and therefore are not eligible to hold a seat in either House of the Legislature.
• Any person who participates in a duel may not hold any public office in the state.
• Giving and receiving oral sex is still prohibited by law.
• Stealing a horse is punishible by hanging.
• No Christian parent may require their children to pick up trash from the highway on Easter day.
• It is legal to gather and consume roadkill.
• The definition of “dumb animal” includes every living creature.
• Interracial marriages are illegal.
• Tattooing a minor is a misdemeanor.
• It is illegal to dare a child to purchase a beer.
• It is illegal to place tacks on a highway.
• Skunks may not be carried into the state.
Tennessee Dumb City Laws
Bell Buckle:
• One may not throw bottles at a tree.
Dyersburg:
• It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date.
Fayette County:
• You may not have more than five inoperable vehicles on a piece of property.
Kimball:
• Bar owners may not let patrons make loud, unusual noises.
Knoxville:
• In front of their buildings, all businesses must have a “hitching post.
Lenior County:
• When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming.
Lexington:
• By law, anyone who has been drinking is “sober” until he or she “cannot hold onto the ground.
• It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
• No one may eat ice cream on the sidewalk.
• Spitting on the sidewalk is prohibited.
Memphis:
• Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
• It’s illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM.
• Panhandlers must first obtain a $10 permit before begging on the streets of downtown Memphis.
• It is illegal to give any pie to fellow diners.
Nashville:
• Spitting is prohibited on sidewalks.
• No person may keep a cheetah as a pet.
• Males may not be sexually aroused in public.
• Anyone rollerblading may not tie his or herself to a moving vehicle on a highway.
• No person may roller skate and listen to a personal cd player at the same time.
• Throwing stones is prohibited as it might break a window.
• To play pinball, one must be 18 years old.
• All persons riding scooters must ride in single file.
Oneida:
• An ordinance forbids anyone to sing the song “It Ain’t Goin’ To Rain No Mo’.
South Dakota Dumb Laws
• No horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants.
• It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory.
• Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or treated in an offensive manner are forbidden.
• If there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you may shoot them.
South Dakota Dumb City Laws:
Spearfish:
• If three or more Indians are walking down the street together, they can be considered a war party and fired upon.
South Carolina Dumb State Laws
• It is illegal to display a confederate flag on a courthouse.
• By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage must take place.
• Railroad companies may be held liable in some instances for scaring horses.
• A railroad my not remove itself from a town of more than five hundred people.
• Fortune tellers are required to obtain a special permit from the state.
• Dance halls may not operate on Sundays.
• No work may be done on Sunday.
• An exception to the above law is that light bulbs may be sold.
• Musical instruments may not be sold on Sunday.
• Performing a U-turn within 1,000 feet of an intersection is illegal.
• It is considered an offense to get a tattoo.
• Horses may not be kept in bathtubs.
• It is illegal to sell any alcoholic beverages on Sunday, unless you own a private club.
• A permit must be obtained to fire a missle.
• It is illegal to give or receive oral sex in South Carolina.
• When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven vehicle you must stop 100 ft from the intersection and discharge a firearm into the air to warn horse traffic.
• It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays.
• Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward off Indian attacks.
• It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide.
• A person must be eighteen years old to play a pinball machine.
South Carolina Dumb State Laws
• It is illegal to display a confederate flag on a courthouse.
• By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage must take place.
• Railroad companies may be held liable in some instances for scaring horses.
• A railroad my not remove itself from a town of more than five hundred people.
• Fortune tellers are required to obtain a special permit from the state.
• Dance halls may not operate on Sundays.
• No work may be done on Sunday.
• An exception to the above law is that light bulbs may be sold.
• Musical instruments may not be sold on Sunday.
• Performing a U-turn within 1,000 feet of an intersection is illegal.
• It is considered an offense to get a tattoo.
• Horses may not be kept in bathtubs.
• It is illegal to sell any alcoholic beverages on Sunday, unless you own a private club.
• A permit must be obtained to fire a missle.
• It is illegal to give or receive oral sex in South Carolina.
• When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven vehicle you must stop 100 ft from the intersection and discharge a firearm into the air to warn horse traffic.
• It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays.
• Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward off Indian attacks.
• It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide.
• A person must be eighteen years old to play a pinball machine.
• Junk dealers may not make any business transactions with drunk persons.
• It is illegal to wear a hat that obstructs people’s view in a public theater or place of amusement.
• Using a firearm to fish is strictly forbidden.
• It is illegal for women to stand within five feet of a bar while drinking.
• You may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April without an official permit.
Wisconsin Dumb State Laws
• Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons.
• Whenever two trains meet at an intersection of said tracks, neither shall proceed until the other has.
• As people used to smuggle it in from Illinois, all yellow butter substitute is banned.
• Condoms were considered an obscene article and had to hidden behind the pharmacist’s counter.
• At one time, margarine was illegal.
• State Law made it illegal to serve apple pie in public restaurants without cheese.
• While all cheese making requires a license, Limburger cheesemaking requires a master cheese maker’s license.
• It is illegal to kiss on a train.
• It is illegal to cut a woman’s hair.
• Margarine may not be substituted for butter in restaurants unless it is requested by the customer.
• The government may not prohibit manual flushed urinals.
• One may not camp in a wagon on any public highway or risk a fine of up to ten dollars.
• It is a class A misdemeanor to wave a burning torch around in the air.
• Livestock have the right-of-way on public roads.
Wisconsin Dumb City Laws
Brookfield:
• Tattooing is illegal unless it is done for medical purposes.
• It is unlawful for one to allow another to use the first person’s telephone in order to make prank phone calls.
Hudson:
• Screens are required on all windows from May 1 to October 1.
Kenosha:
• No male is allowed to be in a state of arousal in public.
La Crosse:
• It is illegal to tie up your horse along Third Street (Now a major bar strip).
• It is illegal to display an unclothed mannequin in a store window.
• It is illegal to play checkers in public.
• You cannot “worry" a squirrel.
Milwaukee:
• An old ordinance forbids parking for over two hours unless a horse is tied to the car.
• If one is thought of as offensive looking, it is illegal for him to be in public during the day.
• It is illegal to purchase or use sparklers in the city, yet you can buy fully disassembled automatic machine guns.
Racine:
• Missiles may not be shot at parade participants.
• It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.
• Women may not walk down a public street at night without being accompanied by a man.
Sheboygan:
• No person may water his lawn in such a way as to annoy his or her neighbor.
St. Croix:
• Women are not allowed to wear anything red in public.
Sun Prairie:
• Nuclear weapons may not be manufactured in the city limits.
• Persons may not ride a bicycle with their hands off the handlebars.
• Cats are forbidden from entering cemeteries.
West Virginia Dumb Laws
• Unmarried couples who live together and “lewdly associate” with one another may face up to a year in prison.
• Any person who commits adultery shall be fined at least twenty dollars.
• It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs.
• A person may be placed in jail for up to six months for making fun of someone who does not accept a challenge.
• It is illegal to snooze on a train.
• A person may not hold public office if he or she has ever participated in a duel.
• For each act of public swearing a person shall be fined one dollar.
• According to the state constitution, it is unlawful for anyone to own a red or a black flag.
• If you wear a hat inside a theater, you may be fined.
• Roadkill may be taken home for supper.
• Whistling underwater is prohibited.
West Virginia Dumb City Laws:
Alderson:
• One may not walk a lion, tiger or leopard, even on a leash.
Huntington:
• Firemen may not whistle or flirt at any woman passing a firehouse.
• It is legal to beat your wife so long as it is done in public on Sunday, on the courthouse steps.
Nicholas County:
• No member of the clergy is allowed to tell jokes or humorous stories from the pulpit during a church service.
Washington Dumb Laws
• No person may walk about in public if he or she has the common cold.
• Destroying a beer cask or bottle of another is illegal.
• It is illegal to entice girls away from the Maple Lane School for girls.
• X-rays may not be used to fit shoes.
• All lollipops are banned.
• A law to reduce crime states: “It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town".
• People may not buy a mattress on Sunday.
• All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle.
• It is illegal to pretend that one’s parents are rich.
• When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed.
• You cannot buy meat of any kind on Sunday.
Washington Dumb City Laws:
Bremerton:
• You may not shuck peanuts on the street.
Everett:
• It is illegal to display a hypnotized or allegedly hypnotized person in a store window.
Lynden:
• Dancing and drinking may not occur at the same establishment.
Seattle:
• You may not carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length.
• Women who sit on men’s laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term.
• No one may set fire to another person’s property without prior permission.
• It is illegal to carry a fishbowl or aquarium onto a bus because the sound of the water sloshing may disturb other passengers.
Spokane:
• No one may kneel on a pedestrian skywalk.
• Persons may not wear a life jacket near the Spokane River.
• TV’s may not be bought on Sundays.
Walla Walla:
• It is illegal to give noxious substances to a bird in any city park.
Wilbur:
• You may not ride an ugly horse.
Virginia Dumb Laws
• Not only is it illegal to have sex with the lights on, one may not have sex in any position other than missionary.
• There is a state law prohibiting “corrupt practices of bribery" by any person other than candidates.
• You may not engage in business on Sundays, with the exception of almost every industry.
• If one is not married, it is illegal for him to have sexual relations.
• You may not have oral or anal sex.
• Citizens must honk their horn while passing other cars.
• Children are not to go trick-or-treating on Halloween.
• It is illegal to tickle women.
• No animal may be hunted for on Sunday with the exception of raccoons, which may be hunted until 2:00 AM.
Virginia Dumb City Laws:
Culpeper:
• No one may wash a mule on the sidewalk.
Dayton:
• A person of color may not be oustide or within the city limits after 7 pm.
Norfolk:
• A man may face 60 days in jail for patting a woman’s derriere.
• Women must wear a corsette after sundown and be in the company of male chaperone.
Prince William County:
• It is illegal to cuss about another.
• It is illegal to park a car on railroad tracks.
Richmond:
• It is illegal to flip a coin in a restaurant to see who pays for a coffee.
Stafford County:
• It is legal for a man to beat his wife on the courthouse steps so long as it is before 8:00 pm.
Virginia Beach:
• If you are drunk and not driving your car, and the person who is driving the car is drunk as well, you may both receive DUIs.
• It is illegal for a person to ride on the handlebars of a bike.
• It is illegal to use profanity on Atlantic Avenue or the boardwalk.
• It is also unlawful to drive by the same place within 30 minutes on Atlantic Avenue.
Waynesboro:
• It is illegal for a woman to drive a car up Main Street unless her husband is walking in front of the car waving a red flag.
Vermont Dumb Laws
• Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.
• At one time it was illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole.
Vermont Dumb City Laws:
Barre:
• All residents shall bathe every Saturday night.
Utah Dumb Laws
• It is against the law to fish from horseback.
• It is illegal not to drink milk.
• It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon.
• Birds have the right of way on all highways.
• A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence.
• It is a felony to persistently tread on the cracks between paving stones on the sidewalk of a state highway.
• It’s legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list.
• No one may have sex in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency call.
• Alcohol may not be sold during an emergency.
• It is illegal to cause a catastrophe.
Utah Dumb City Laws:
Kaysville:
• You must have identification to enter a convenience store after dark.
Logan:
• Women may not swear.
Monroe:
• Daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor.
Provo:
• Throwing snowballs will result in a $50 fine.
Salt Lake County:
• No one may walk down the street carrying a paper bag containing a violin.
• Auctions may not be advertised by hiring trombone players to play on the street.
Tremonton:
• It is illegal to have sex in a moving ambulance and if you are caught the guy is let go and the woman is punished and her name appears in the newspaper.
Texas Dumb State Laws
• One must acknowledge a supreme being before being able to hold public office.
• The Bluebonnet is the official song of the state flower.
• It is illegal to sell ones eye.
• A program has been created in the state that attempts to control the weather.
• When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.
• It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
• Up to a felony charge can be levied for promoting the use of, or owning more than six dildos.
• It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel.
• It is illegal to milk another person’s cow.
• A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.
• Homosexual behavior is a misdemeanor offense.
• The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home.
Texas Dumb City Laws
Abilene:
• It is illegal to idle or loiter anyplace within the corporate limits of the city for the purpose of flirting or mashing.
Austin:
• Wire cutters can not be carried in your pocket.
Beaumont:
• Collegiate football is banned at Lamar University.
Borger:
• It is against the law to throw confetti, rubber balls, feather dusters, whips or quirts (riding crop), and explosive firecrackers of any kind.
Clarendon:
• It is illegal to dust any public building with a feather duster.
Dallas:
• It’s illegal to possess realistic dildos.
El Paso
• Urinating on the streets is illegal.
• Appearing in public places wearing a “lewd dress” is prohibited.
El Paso:
• Churches, hotels, halls of assembly, stores, markets, banking rooms, railroad depots, and saloons are required to provide spittoons “of a kind and number to efficiently contain expectorations into them.
Galveston:
• It is illegal to drive a motor car down Broadway before noon on Sundays.
• "Offensive gestures" will not be tolerated at any special event.
• Bicycles must be operated at a “reasonable speed”.
• One needs permission from the director of parks and recreation before getting drunk in any city park.
• No person shall throw trash from an airplane.
• Landing an airplane on the beach is illegal.
• No person shall inhale fumes from model glue.
• Any person who sits on a sidewalk may be fined up to $500.
Harker Heights:
• No person may disturb a church service by swearing.
• Drivers of city vehicles must respect all traffic rules just like the rest of us.
Houston:
• It is illegal to sell Limburger cheese on Sunday.
• Beer may not be purchased after midnight on a Sunday, but it may be purchased on Monday.
Jasper:
• Dogs must be on a leash at ALL times.
LeFors:
• It is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer while standing.
Lubbock County:
• It is illegal to drive within an arm’s length of alcohol – including alcohol in someone else’s blood stream.
Mesquite:
• It is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
Port Arthur:
• Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in an elevator.
Richardson:
• It is illegal to do “U Turns”.
• It is now illegal to place a “for sale” sign on a car if it visible from the street.
San Antonio:
• It is illegal to urinate on the Alamo.
• It is illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation using the eyes and/or hands.
Temple:
• Cattle thieves may be hanged on the spot.
• You can ride your horse in the saloon.
• No one may ride a horse and buggy through the town square.
Texarkana:
• Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights.
Tennessee Dumb Laws
• You can’t shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile.
• Hollow logs may not be sold.
• More than 8 women may not live in the same house because that would constitute a brothel.
• It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish.
• “Crimes against nature” are prohibited.
• Ministers are to be dedicated to God and therefore are not eligible to hold a seat in either House of the Legislature.
• Any person who participates in a duel may not hold any public office in the state.
• Giving and receiving oral sex is still prohibited by law.
• Stealing a horse is punishible by hanging.
• No Christian parent may require their children to pick up trash from the highway on Easter day.
• It is legal to gather and consume roadkill.
• The definition of “dumb animal” includes every living creature.
• Interracial marriages are illegal.
• Tattooing a minor is a misdemeanor.
• It is illegal to dare a child to purchase a beer.
• It is illegal to place tacks on a highway.
• Skunks may not be carried into the state.
Tennessee Dumb City Laws
Bell Buckle:
• One may not throw bottles at a tree.
Dyersburg:
• It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date.
Fayette County:
• You may not have more than five inoperable vehicles on a piece of property.
Kimball:
• Bar owners may not let patrons make loud, unusual noises.
Knoxville:
• In front of their buildings, all businesses must have a “hitching post.
Lenior County:
• When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming.
Lexington:
• By law, anyone who has been drinking is “sober” until he or she “cannot hold onto the ground.
• It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
• No one may eat ice cream on the sidewalk.
• Spitting on the sidewalk is prohibited.
Memphis:
• Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
• It’s illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM.
• Panhandlers must first obtain a $10 permit before begging on the streets of downtown Memphis.
• It is illegal to give any pie to fellow diners.
Nashville:
• Spitting is prohibited on sidewalks.
• No person may keep a cheetah as a pet.
• Males may not be sexually aroused in public.
• Anyone rollerblading may not tie his or herself to a moving vehicle on a highway.
• No person may roller skate and listen to a personal cd player at the same time.
• Throwing stones is prohibited as it might break a window.
• To play pinball, one must be 18 years old.
• All persons riding scooters must ride in single file.
Oneida:
• An ordinance forbids anyone to sing the song “It Ain’t Goin’ To Rain No Mo’.
South Dakota Dumb Laws
• No horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants.
• It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory.
• Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or treated in an offensive manner are forbidden.
• If there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you may shoot them.
South Dakota Dumb City Laws:
Spearfish:
• If three or more Indians are walking down the street together, they can be considered a war party and fired upon.
South Carolina Dumb State Laws
• It is illegal to display a confederate flag on a courthouse.
• By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage must take place.
• Railroad companies may be held liable in some instances for scaring horses.
• A railroad my not remove itself from a town of more than five hundred people.
• Fortune tellers are required to obtain a special permit from the state.
• Dance halls may not operate on Sundays.
• No work may be done on Sunday.
• An exception to the above law is that light bulbs may be sold.
• Musical instruments may not be sold on Sunday.
• Performing a U-turn within 1,000 feet of an intersection is illegal.
• It is considered an offense to get a tattoo.
• Horses may not be kept in bathtubs.
• It is illegal to sell any alcoholic beverages on Sunday, unless you own a private club.
• A permit must be obtained to fire a missle.
• It is illegal to give or receive oral sex in South Carolina.
• When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven vehicle you must stop 100 ft from the intersection and discharge a firearm into the air to warn horse traffic.
• It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays.
• Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward off Indian attacks.
• It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide.
• A person must be eighteen years old to play a pinball machine.
South Carolina Dumb State Laws
• It is illegal to display a confederate flag on a courthouse.
• By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage must take place.
• Railroad companies may be held liable in some instances for scaring horses.
• A railroad my not remove itself from a town of more than five hundred people.
• Fortune tellers are required to obtain a special permit from the state.
• Dance halls may not operate on Sundays.
• No work may be done on Sunday.
• An exception to the above law is that light bulbs may be sold.
• Musical instruments may not be sold on Sunday.
• Performing a U-turn within 1,000 feet of an intersection is illegal.
• It is considered an offense to get a tattoo.
• Horses may not be kept in bathtubs.
• It is illegal to sell any alcoholic beverages on Sunday, unless you own a private club.
• A permit must be obtained to fire a missle.
• It is illegal to give or receive oral sex in South Carolina.
• When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven vehicle you must stop 100 ft from the intersection and discharge a firearm into the air to warn horse traffic.
• It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays.
• Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward off Indian attacks.
• It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide.
• A person must be eighteen years old to play a pinball machine.
American Beauty- Admin
- Posts : 304
Join date : 2011-03-26
Location : Texas
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